Shackled
Shattered my daze, the gavel was struck
Scattered Convictions, aspirations undone
Gasp of a windowless cage, the door has been shut
Incredulous denial, is it not me who has won?
I lash out at a fate of my own doing
Bound to my destiny, by my own chain
I am my own judge, my scruples, my jury
Why do I still play this losing game?
The shackles that sometimes hold me are there because I put them there.
I want them. I question them. I hate them. I need them.
There is a reason why everything is where it is.
Or maybe I shall never step out of my bubble.
Phases of life when I am more contemplative than frivolous, so often brought on by pleasant but painful triggers, have me hunting for the spirits that torment my soul.
None fully understands the workings of another’s mind, another’s life. And yet we nod - Do you understand? Yes I do.
The ordered anarchy continues…
Scattered Convictions, aspirations undone
Gasp of a windowless cage, the door has been shut
Incredulous denial, is it not me who has won?
I lash out at a fate of my own doing
Bound to my destiny, by my own chain
I am my own judge, my scruples, my jury
Why do I still play this losing game?
The shackles that sometimes hold me are there because I put them there.
I want them. I question them. I hate them. I need them.
There is a reason why everything is where it is.
Or maybe I shall never step out of my bubble.
Phases of life when I am more contemplative than frivolous, so often brought on by pleasant but painful triggers, have me hunting for the spirits that torment my soul.
None fully understands the workings of another’s mind, another’s life. And yet we nod - Do you understand? Yes I do.
The ordered anarchy continues…
SoleSearching at 3:34 AM
5 Comments:
You played the games
Now you have your win
You were the tyrant
And you are the victim
But one day when you sit
And balance all your books
Would you remember those
From whom you turned away?
That was a great post valhalla
Ahh, now you have me thinking. Your post reminds me: we all have a way of rationalizing, to our benefit or to our detriment: why we are where we are... or, where we should be and why. We cannot focus on everything at once; "triggers" make us zoom in on certain aspects of our selves, and it is up to us to make a valuation. Hmm. I share your contemplative mood. ^_^ I wish you all the best, dear. (I've missed visiting your site, and of course, dwelling on your thought-provoking pieces.)
Soulless!! Where have you been!? Fascinating comments, you extract meanings so well from words.
How are you?
Ah, you humble me, dear. ^_^ Thank you for an appreciative response, and, of course, for the warm welcome. Haha. I'm feeling more human, less a machine, since I no longer have to worry about deadlines and keeping myself awake and mentally functioning for 12-18 hours nonstop. Well, for the meantime, that is. Argh. Haha. I've missed reading poetry blogs. *hint, hint* (I'll keep checking your site for an update. Hee. Be well.)
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